DCA Adds Corner to Cry While Missing Your Flight at New Security Checkpoint
Issue No. 68
DCA Adds Corner to Cry While Missing Your Flight at New Security Checkpoint
Quiz: Are You at the 9:30 Club or is the Trader Joe’s Playlist Especially Bumping Today?
Brookland Woman Fails to Convince Grandmother That Gaining Weight on Antidepressants is Better Than Daily Psychotic Episodes
80's Coming of Age Movies To Masturbate to in Your Childhood Bedroom This Holiday Weekend
The Breakfast Club
Footloose
Big
Dirty Dancing
Ferris Bueller’s Day Off
The Goonies
The Lost Boys
Weird Science
Labyrinth
Back to the Future
Short Circuit
Columbia Heights Target Amps Up Chanukah Display With Bucket of Potatoes Labeled “Pre-Latkes”
"No Bones Day," Shrugs Navy Yard Textualist with Whiskey Dick
"We Are So Different", Says Red Derby Regular Upset He Was Confused with a Lyman's Regular
When you hear about Washington DC, you may think about monuments, museums, and politics. However, DC also has a cool nightlife that includes several dive bars. Jimmy Trent, a 31 year old man living in Petworth, is a regular at Red Derby. He gets upset every time he’s confused with a Lyman’s regular.
“Those two dive bars couldn’t be more different,” said Jimmy while having Mac 'n Cheese wedges at Red Derby. “For instance, Red Derby’s address is 3718 14th St NW. Lyman’s address is 3720 14th St. NW”.
“Only dumb people would confuse me with a Lyman’s regular. They are two diametrically opposed bars,” said Jimmy. “For instance, Red Derby has video games. Lyman has pinball machines. Completely different ways of entertainment”.
“To be honest, I don’t know the difference between those two bars,” said Angela Smith, Jimmy’s friend. “They have the same vibe, music, and generic but tasty bar food. When Jimmy is not around, I go to the one that is less crowded”.
At the time of publication, Jimmy was found at Lyman after he discovered a PBR only cost $4, while it cost $4.50 at Red Derby .
